Sindhi Tattler

Wedding Jokes

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Jokes

The Humble Sindhi Modern Bride
 A newly wed girl was being welcomed at the husband’s home in a traditional manner.
As expected, she gave a little speech:

"My dear family members, I thank you for welcoming me in my new home and family", she said    "Firstly, With my presence I would not want to create any inconveniences - my being here does not mean that I would want to change your way of life, your routine."

"What do you mean my child?" asked the patriarch of the family.

What I mean dad is: Those who used to wash dishes must carry on washing them. Those who used to do the laundry must carry on doing it.   Those who cooked shouldn't stop on my account. Those who used to clean should clean. As for me, I am here just to entertain your son!

Priceless Wisdom
Ramchand Sindhi wakes up at home with a huge hangover. He forces himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins and a glass of water on the side table. He sits down and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed. Ramchand looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotless, clean. So is the rest of the house.

He takes the aspirins and notices a note on the table. "Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to go shopping. Love you!" So he goes to the kitchen and sure enough there is a hot breakfast and the morning newspaper. His son is also at the table, eating. Ramchand asks, "Son, what happened last night?"

His son says, "Well, you came home around 3 AM, drunk and delirious. Broke some furniture, puked in the hallway, and gave yourself a black eye when you stumbled into the door". Confused, Ramchand asks, "So, why is everything in order and so clean, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me? I should expect a big quarrel with her!"

His son replies, "Oh, that! Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your clothes n shoes off, you said, "Lady leave me alone! I'm married!"
Moral
Self-induced hangover -- Rs. 2000.00 Broken furniture -- Rs. 20,000.00
Breakfast -- Rs. 100.00 Saying The Right Thing While Drunk - PRICELESS

And to the couple:

To keep a marriage brimming
With love in the loving cup,
When you are wrong, admit it
And when you are right, shut up!

And here’s is a 1760 old saying: “May you grow old on one pillow.”

BROTHERLY  LOVE
A Sindhi walks into a bar in London and orders 3-glasses of beer and sits in the backyard of the room, drinking a sip out of each one in turn. When he finishes, he comes back to the bar counter and orders 3 more. The bartender asks him, "You know, beer goes flat after I fill it in the glass; it would taste better if you buy one at a time."

The Sindhi replies, "Well, you see, I have two brothers. One is in Dubai, the other in Canada and I'm here in London. When they left home, we promised that we’d drink this way to remember the days when we drank together. The bartender admits that this is a nice custom and leaves it there.

The Sindhi became a regular in the bar, and always drinks the same way. He orders 3-Beers and drinks them in turn. One day, he came in and ordered only 2-Beers All the other regulars notice and fall silent.

When he comes back to the bar for the second round, the bartender says, "I don't want to intrude on your grief, but I wanted to offer my sincere condolences on your great loss. "

The man looked confused for a moment, and then he laughs.... "Oh, no," he, said, "Everyone's fine - both my brothers are alive”. " The only thing is I just quit drinking!

Sindhi funeral

A family in Ajmer was puzzled when the coffin of their dead mother (Dadi) arrived from the US. It was sent by one of the daughters.

The dead body was very tightly squeezed inside the coffin, with no space left in it when they opened the lid; they found a letter on top addressed to her brothers and sisters:

Dear Bhagwan, Sunder, Laxmi and Varsha,
I am sending Dadi's body to you, since it was her wish that she should be cremated in the compound of our Indian home in Ajmer. Sorry, I could not come along as all of my paid leave is consumed. You will find inside the coffin, under Dadi's body, cans of cheese, 10 packets of M and M chocolates and 8 packets of Badam (peanuts) please divide these among all of you.

On Dadi's feet you will find a new pair of Reebok shoes (size 10) for Mohan. There are also 2 pairs of shoes for Radha's and Lakshmi's sons. Hope the sizes are correct. Dadi is wearing 6 American T-shirts. The large size is for Mohan.

Just distribute the rest among yourselves.

The 2 new Jeans that Dadi is wearing are for the boys. The Swiss watch that Devi wanted is on Dadi's left wrist. Shanta chaachi, Dadi is wearing the necklace, earrings and ring that you asked for. Please take them off her. The 6 white cotton socks that Dadi is wearing must be divided among my nephews.
Please distribute all these fairly.

Love Janki.

PS: If anything more required let me know soon as Dada is also not feeling too well now a days. 

Oh My God my R----?

A very successful Sindhi parked his brand new Porsche Carrera GT in at the front of the office, ready to show it off to his colleagues. As he got out, a truck came along too close to the car and completely tore off the driver's door. Fortunately, a cop in a police car was close enough to see the accident and pulled up behind the Porsche, his lights flashing.

But, before the cop had a chance to ask any questions, the Sindhi started screaming hysterically about how his Porsche, which he had just picked up the day before, was now completely ruined and would never be the same again. After the Sindhi finally wound down from his rant, the cop shook his head in disgust and disbelief. 'I can't believe how materialistic you Sindhis are,' he said.

'You are so focused on your possessions that you neglect the most important things in life.'
'How can you say such a thing?' asked the Sindhi.
The cop replied, 'Don't you even realize that your left arm is missing? It got ripped off when the truck hit you!'

'OH, MY GOD!' screamed the Sindhi. 'MY ROLEX!'

Jokes

 

 

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